Things Never to Say to Sevies
Random words appear to trigger these picayune, loud group of students. Even in daily conversation the normal human must be vigilant at all times in order to avoid chaos. In order to survive social interaction with this group, scientifically known as “minima septem”, you must know what to avoid at all costs.
These Sevies are in a species known as Gen Z (not to mistake with Millennials or the iGeneration) and this generation is extremely close to their electronic devices. (One brand attempted to take over multiple times. Including trying to trademark the generation name itself- iGeneration)
The first category is the most crucial to avoid, as the reaction to these are incredibly notorious among Sevies and reactions tend to be loud and extremely obnoxious. These are known as “quantum mali viti”, or cringey vine references.
Quantum Mali Viti- Vines
These appear in everyday sentences, and therefore are the most perilous to use, as it is more likely for one to be brought up without knowledge. When one Sevie uses one of these, (most often the male gender) the reaction is contagious to all nearby Sevies in the area.
- Road work ahead
- Chicken strips
- Hurricane Katrina
- Hey, I’m lesbian
- What are those?
- I won’t hesitate
- Why you lying?
- Is that a weed?
- It’s Wednesday
- That’s my opinion
- You’re not my dad
- They were roommates
- LeBron James
- Watch your profanity
- Your actions have consequences
- That is not correct
- I’m Jared, I’m 19
- Try me
- I’m about to say it
Certain people obtain unwanted attention from Sevies, merely because of their name and the fact that Sevies have not yet evolved to know the definition of personal space. If you have any of the following names, I would strongly encourage you to stay clear of areas where Sevies are said to be.
- Jeff, or Jeffery
- Moe, Wiley, Wang, (Not specifically for this generation, but just awkward in general)
Also, Sevies tend to believe that they are very politically educated. Which, of course, becomes obviously transparent when you interact with one. Under no circumstances bring up the president of the United States, and/or and leaders of other nations.
There are two branches of movement this species categorize as ‘dancing’. It often divides by gender, but not necessarily. The females tend to be drawn towards the “tenoris”, commonly known as “trends”. This generates from certain areas worshiped by Sevies, such as Instagram, Snapchat, Youtube and a very obnoxious new one rising from the stubble of it’s predecessor Musically- TikTok. Yet this is not to mistake with talent, or real dance, in any way, shape or form. The males tend to be drawn toward Fortnight dances, which is a much more violent form of movement also commonly mistaken for real dance. This display is continually difficult to watch, and such as certain references discussed above, is contagious and often results in multiple displays in one area.
Another basic survival skill that is critical to endure these ‘Sevies’ is to be able to predict when and where they’ll be, as well as what they’ll do. Do not engage in any interaction with one at any cost. In the worst case scenario and you must, show no emotion.
Luckily, there is hope. As their life span is relatively short- a year to be precise- you simply have to wait and they’ll be gone forever. Yet some people tend to keep certain tenancies displayed by “Sevies” through out their lives. That is the number one reason why mental hospitals are still around. Yet others tend to live unnoticed and untreated, yet if you find one or even begin to suspect they have these tenancies, inform the nearest authority and move two states over. This ‘disease’ tends to hold on longer to the males, and hasn’t been found in any girls other than those found in Starbucks- current investigations ongoing currently in multiple states in the US.
To conclude, not everyone is safe, and in the more than likely event that you should encounter one, there are multiple measures that you can take to ensure your probability for survival. Help us raise awareness, and share this article to provide knowledge to everyone on how to help themselves.